Animal Cops is conducting yet another torture chamber for it's loyal viewers.  Being a loyal viewer, naturally I'm glued to the television.  As are Muttin/Jeff too.  Well, they're eyes are closed, feigning indifference, but I know better.  Plus I keep yelling at them to pay attention. 

Animal Cop:  When you adopt a dog from the shelter, they just seem to appreciate it.  (As we watch an adorable dog look up adoringly at it's new owner).

Me:  Did you guys hear that? 

Muttin opens her eyes, just to rudely roll her eyes.

Muttin to Jeff:  Here she goes again.  The Why Aren't We Grateful Rant.

Jeff doesn't dare say anything, because he actually IS grateful, but he can't show it cause that would make him a wimp in her eyes.  He does however, tend to forget that I am the head dog, not her, so I'm not gonna cut him any slack. 

Animal Cop:  Shelter dogs know they've been rescued and appreciate being at a better place - they just seem to make excellent dogs, and they actually seem pretty grateful.

I point to the TV excitedly.

Me:  Ha!  See?  I TOLD you so.  I wasn't just speaking out my butt when I said you guys don't appreciate things around here the way you should.  Just cause I pick up your poops doesn't mean you're higher up the food chain than I am.  It's not like I have a choice - the landlady MAKES me, and I blame her for your uppity attitude.  Muttin.  (Trying to cut Jeffrey some slack after all, cause I'm kind that way). 

Jeffrey wags his tail, understanding perfectly but glancing at his sister apprehensively, hoping that Muttin hadn't caught on.

Muttin to Jeff:  No suck luck.  I caught on.  You're such a puss, and a shame to dogdom.  If we had to make it  on our own, you wouldn't be welcomed back into the hood, you know that, don't you?  We'd be outcasts to the dogs on the street.

I look at her intently.  Is this her way of letting me know that she really is grateful?  I mean... dogs on the street?  Does she realize how lucky she is after all?

Muttin:  Not a chance.  I meant HE'D be an outcast in the hood.  I, however, would be welcomed and be made their queen and be called Darling Queen. 

I tried to pass off my tears to the fact that Animal Cop had just told me a starved horse had just given up the will to live and died.  Muttin wouldn't have any of it, and looked at me witheringly. 

Muttin:  Puss. 


She laughs.