I think I may not be normal

As I roam around the Internet, reading about everyone's preparations for Blogher, I began to feel... weird. 

The newbie's are worried they won't fit in, or find someone to be friends with, or that they'll be ignored, and unnoticed.  EVERYONE is worried about what to wear, and the shoes - dear god, the shoes.  And packing.  No one's started packing yet. 

Hmmm.  I'm a newbie. I was excited about meeting up with Greenish Lady, but her mother died, so she had to fly back home to Ireland for the funeral. So sorry, Imelda.

I'm packed.  I've got travel down to an art.  I could care less about the clothes.  And the shoes?  Am I really spose to care so much about shoes?  What is wrong with me that I don't care about shoes?  Well, maybe that one is a no-brainer, since there's no way I can wear anything but water shoes or flat sandals.  Or Crocs.

No, I'd be too scared to wear Crocs, cause Dooce HATES them.  The whole sordid story is here.  It's not pretty. 

I can't afford to stay at the pricey hotel that they booked for us Bloghers.  I can't afford the drinking and drinking that everyone talks (brags???) about, and I probably shouldn't drink cause of my meds.  I would of course like to meet bloggers, specially the ones I read everyday, but I'm mostly going for inspiration and learning.  I really hope it's not just one big party, but it's really hard to see past all the partying because that's all anyone is talking about.  That and not being packed yet. 

I probably should get to coloring my gray roots, but really ... I'm not really caring if it gets done or not. 

I'm beginning to feel like I'm not gonna fit in cause I was not giving a damn whether I fit in or not.  I think I'm ... unfeminine or something.

Shut up. 

*
In other news, I've still got edges of nausea going on, but the new medication really helps.  I'm debating whether to take my walker or not - sure comes in handy at the airport, don't have rent one of those luggage carts. 

I'm so so tired tho. 

*

Comments

Good luck from an old friend.

[TC]

Have a great time!!! You have the magic of being an instant friend and are so open to new things that I believe you will have SOOOOO much fun!

[meredith]

Hello from Canada. Just found your blog. Thank you for the words.........which I CAN SO RELATE TO about the symptoms of ms. It is quite the adventure.............and so misunderstood by so many. I wonder why some individuals including inlaws are so insensitive and think they know it all? I have heard "everyone gets something after forty" '
'"your interferon is not as strong as alpha interferon" "your nausea and dizziness may be something else (it 35 degrees}" "you look great [just lost 25 lbs. and your skin is transparent" etc.......................etc. HOW DO YOU HANDLE INSENSITIVE INDIVIDUALS? I was finally labelled with ms. and even then told by a neurologist it was probably mild and I wouldn't qualify for meds. I promptly went to a ms clinic on my own................and qualified for the help I needed. I am a previous intensive care nurse who was labelled as lazy by some collegues and was told I was not ill that it was STRESS. THEY WERE SO JUDGEMENTAL AND SO WRONG. Currently recovering from optic nerve neuritis [left eye] and herpetic lesion [right eye] due to comprised immune system due to betaseron . THANKS FOR YOUR SITE MEREDITH

[meredith]

Hello from Canada. Just found your blog. Thank you for the words.........which I CAN SO RELATE TO about the symptoms of ms. It is quite the adventure.............and so misunderstood by so many. I wonder why some individuals including inlaws are so insensitive and think they know it all? I have heard "everyone gets something after forty" '
'"your interferon is not as strong as alpha interferon" "your nausea and dizziness may be something else (it 35 degrees}" "you look great [just lost 25 lbs. and your skin is transparent" etc.......................etc. HOW DO YOU HANDLE INSENSITIVE INDIVIDUALS? I was finally labelled with ms. and even then told by a neurologist it was probably mild and I wouldn't qualify for meds. I promptly went to a ms clinic on my own................and qualified for the help I needed. I am a previous intensive care nurse who was labelled as lazy by some collegues and was told I was not ill that it was STRESS. THEY WERE SO JUDGEMENTAL AND SO WRONG. Currently recovering from optic nerve neuritis [left eye] and herpetic lesion [right eye] due to comprised immune system due to betaseron . THANKS FOR YOUR SITE MEREDITH